How to Overcome Fear of "What will Other People Think"

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This is Founders Club - a supportive community for remarkable founders & CEOs that nurtures wellness and meaningful connections.

Each week, we give you tools to overcome common founder struggles.

In today’s newsletter:

• Solving Fear of “What will Other People Think”

• 3 NYC TechWeek Events!

Welcome to the multi-part series on Solving Fear of Failure.

See Part 1 for Solving Fear of Uncertainty and Decreased Self-Worth.

Do you fear "What will other people think”?

This one’s for you 👇️ 

Overcoming Fear of “What will Other People Think?”

1. Mindset Shift: You can’t control what other people think

Have you ever done something well-intentioned, something that you know was the right thing to do and were still criticized or judged for your actions?

Welcome to planet Earth.

There will always be people who will judge no matter what you do.

Know that this has close to nothing to do with you and almost everything to do with their triggers, insecurities and fears.

You can’t control what other people think.

So why spend time on it?

Focus on doing your best and improving your own opinion of your actions, as that’s the only opinion in your control.

2. What if it works?

How exciting would that be!

Exercise: List all the amazing things that could happen if your idea works and really feel that success

Your list might look something like this:

• meet incredible people

• make new friends (who support me rather than judge me)

• grow my network

• introduce a new product/service to market

• help X amount of people/businesses

• feel independent and free

• feel in charge of my life

• become an expert in a particular industry

• be invited to speak at conferences

• raise $X

• generate $Y

• have company valued at $Z

• make more than I made at my full-time job

• sell company & retire or build the next thing I’m excited about

• be able to share my wealth with family and friends

• have the life I want

• feel really proud

• not regret never trying

Make this list your own. The more detail the better. Truly visualize it.

Now ask yourself: Wouldn’t it be a pity to forego all that just cause a few folks might judge you?

3. Past Success are Your Fuel

Exercise: Think of 1-2 instances when you feared being judged but did it anyway and got a lot of benefits.
Think back to these when this fear arises again.

Here is one that I think back to whenever I need to step over myself:

About a year ago I was terrified of posting on LinkedIn.

I’ve objectively done way scarier things in life, but something about LinkedIn was petrifying.

I knew that it could be beneficial but the fear of “what will other people think” paralyzed me.

Multiple coaching sessions and breathing exercises later, I finally committed to making 1 post.

I reread the text 23 times and pressed “Post”. 

My heart-beat went through the roof. 

“What will other ppl think” was racing through my mind.  

Turns out, nobody was there to judge.

Ppl left likes, positive comments and moved on. 

It was actually quite anticlimactic. 

The benefits, however, have been insane.

Posting on LinkedIn has literally changed my life:

• I met thousands of incredible entrepreneurs and investors. 

• Got DM’d and approached IRL by people I couldn’t dream of reaching out to before 

• Got sponsorships and opportunities I didn’t realize were possible 

What a pity it would have been to forego all of that just from worrying about “what will other ppl think.”

Ngl, I still feared a little what people might think when making my 2nd post.

3rd post onwards, it didn’t even cross my mind. 

4. Mindset Shift: People whose opinion you’re concerned about are NOT living the life you want

Can you list out specific people whose opinion you’re concerned about?

If you can, does each of these individuals have the exact life you want?

• do they have the business you want?

• do they have the family you want?

• do they have the partner you want?

• do they have the friends you want?

• do they have the lifestyle you want?

• do they have the freedom you want?

• do they have the $$ you want?

Likely not. They have NOT built the life you want. Then why do you care what they think?

p.s. Were you unable to list specific individuals?

Then trust me, the average human does NOT have the life you want.

Stop letting people you can’t even think of prevent you from building the future you want.

p.p.s. If a person is a founder, they are more likely to have supportive thoughts towards you because founders get the struggle.

We know that building a business requires doing cringey things, figuring out answers as you go, making mistakes and hard decisions.

Surround yourself with more supportive founders. Join community for remarkable founders.

Try these exercises and let us know what you think!

NY Tech Week is Back!

Excited to share events we’re hosting with phenomenal co-hosts:

☕ NYC Tech Breakfast Club with Morgan Barrett (Optimal, Tech Breakfast Club)
🕵‍♂️ Internet Pipes Meetup with Steph Smith (a16z)
🚴‍♂️ Equinox Spinning for Founders & Funders with Tem (Optemization)

Looking forward to seeing you there!

Rooting for you!
Founders Club